Reasons Why it Was Not a Ninja...

I came across a news headline this morning that states, "3 Armed Ninjas Rob Man in His Florida Driveway" found here. Here are the facts:

• The Victim claimed that three men dressed as "ninjas" held him down and took his wallet cell phone and cash.
• The "ninjas" were wearing gloves and had guns.
• The "ninjas" had everything covered except for their eyes and spoke in very low tones.
• Two of the three "ninjas" have been arrested.
  

Based on these facts, here's why these 3 men were definitely NOT ninjas:

1. The fact that there were 3 of them. If a real ninja was involved, it would only take one to get the job done.
2. A ninja doesn't need to hold down their victim. If a ninja wants someone's wallet, they'll just take it and the victim wouldn't feel anything.
3. The fact that the "ninjas" had guns. Since when do ninjas carry guns!? Ninja Stars, a sword/dagger and maybe some nun-chucks... maybe. And that's it!
4. The "ninjas" spoke in very low tones. Ninjas don't need to instruct their victims on what to do. They just do what they want without making a single sound.
5. The fact that they got caught. Everyone knows ninjas don't get caught. They have ways of making themselves disappear unnoticed. Ninjas would never have a car with a license plate to give them up, or leave any kind of paper trail. Come on.
6. And most importantly, the victim is still alive. If a real ninja has a target, that target will meet its maker 10 times out of 10.

And that's why, these men were not ninjas.

Orange Box

My brother got me the Orange Box set of Half-Life related games for my birthday this month. I must say, if you're any gamer of sorts, this is definitely worth picking up. I've been playing Team Fortress 2 (which feels almost like I'm in a Pixar movie with the graphics), and I already feel like it's worth buying. I have yet to play Half-Life 2, Episode 1, Episode 2 and Portal... the latter being amazing from what I've heard. So, if you haven't gotten on this bandwagon yet, now is the time. And then let me know so we can play! Of course, the last 2 weeks have been completely dominated by family events, with Thanksgiving and all... so it's time to get back on track. Unfortunately, I'm at work at the moment...

Why the Chargers are the Most Frustrating Team to Watch in the NFL

Okay.  So, I was pretty excited when the Chargers picked up Chris Chambers a few weeks back.  Wide Receiver has been a weakness for the Chargers as of late... and I thought to myself, "Finally.  Now we're gonna start seeing some great things happen."  Unfortunately, nothing of the sort came to be.  After watching the Chargers lose to the Jaguars today, I can easily explain why they are the most frustrating team to watch in the NFL:

1) The Special Teams Unit is one of the best in the league -- Between Darren Sproles, Kassim Osgood, Nate Kaeding and Mike Scifres, there's a pretty solid core.

2) The Defense Unit is strong enough to be respectable -- Antonio Comrartie alone has had amazing games by picking off quarterbacks left and right.  And there's always pressure coming from Phillips and Merriman.

While points 1 and 2 are great things, here comes the kicker:

3) The Offense is Horrific!  If you look at the starting offense on paper: LaDanian Tomlinson,  Michael Turner, Antonio Gates, Chris Chambers, Vincent Jackson and Phillip Rivers (before this season started), you would think that if there were any weaknesses in the Chargers, it would most certainly not be in the offense.  That my friend, is where both you and I would be wrong.

Of course, you can always get on the bandwagon to blame Norv Turner for all of the Chargers' problems... but even though has done things deserving scorn, it comes down to whether or not the Chargers can execute.  Watching an All-Star offense struggle to get a first down, let alone a touch down is just sickening.

All right... that's my rant.  I'll move on now.

With Cookies?

There was a headline in the news today that starts with "Illinois College Bans 2 Students Accused of Torturing Man With..." and I assumed something horrible would follow. Some kind of brutal attack that I would just skip over... since I can only take so much gloomy news before I need to bask in the sun for 13 hours. In any case, what would follow was beyond anything I had ever expected: "...With Freshly Baked Cookies." And no, this is not a joke. You can see the story here. So, I thought to myself--attacked with COOKIES?? What does that even look like? The cookies are fresh out of the oven, and they just put it on the guy's face or something? Or is it more like "I don't care if you're full, eat the cookie. And there's an Oatmeal Raisin batch about to be done as well! (As he readies the oven mit)" In any case... I thought it was a good laugh.

Leopard a Reality

So, now that Leopard has been set free, I ordered myself up a new Macbook. Now, I've never owned a Mac before, so I figure this will be a great learning experience -- trying to unlearn all of the habits (for better or for worse) that Microsoft has engraved in my brain to become comfortable with a new operating system paradigm. I may have jumped in just a little too soon since there are a few bugs that need to be patched in Leopard to increase the stability, but so far, I cannot say that I've been disappointed. The only thing that bugs me is that four days after I ordered my Macbook, Apple goes and updates the hardware specs... so I got the older specs on mine. Of course, the upgrade didn't make a HUGE difference according to reviews, so oh well. Anyway, I'm stoked to try this out and learn something new. Front Row alone is pretty sweet!

How Much?

Just a quick story that I thought was pretty funny: I recently told someone that I work with that I just turned a quarter of a century old. She stopped and had one of those looks on her face like you knew she was putting in some serious number crunching time. About 5-10 seconds later she replied, "So, you're like 20?" True story my friends. True Story.